The Cold.

Growth. It's crazy, isn't it? The irreversible change that is almost always immeasurable. Sometimes you yearn to grow so desperately, you psych yourself into thinking you've changed, made significant improvements, grew up. Delusions and whatnot. Nurturing this ridiculous notion that there is a chance of you making a difference when you're clinging onto the you you have been your entire existence. 

Then there are times you actually commit yourself into His hands and let growth, happen.

in between the extremities, the quiet right now is not too bad a consolation.